Friday, 27 March 2015

One bet each way - Tony and Clare Rufo

Over the past decade, Hamilton residents Tony (Antonio) and Clare Rufo have travelled regularly to San Donato Val di Comino, Tony’s ancestral home town in Italy. Accompanied by family and friends, they fill a dozen rooms in a large B&B, and revel in the festival atmosphere that takes over each August. The population triples, as people make the journey home from far afield. Not just within Italy, but from places popular with emigrating San Donatese like Boston, New York, Toronto, and Ireland, for a month of parties and celebrations.

San Donato is a picturesque medieval town with an ancient past, 110 km east of Rome. It is partly inside the 500 square kilometre Parco Nazionale d’Abruzzo, famous for protected species such as Marsican brown bear and the Italian wolf.

San Donato Val di Comino is 700 metres above sea level

Climbing up narrow, almost vertical steps from the town square to their homes is an everyday challenge for its 3000 residents; for newcomers, it’s a brutal initiation.

San Donato residents keep fit navigating steep streets and alleyways
Photograph from the Rufo family collection

Tony left San Donato in 1962 when he was 18 years of age. Four of his 8 brothers and one of his 2 sisters had already migrated to Newcastle, Australia. Tony remembers the family being invited by the Australian government to join them, but his grandfather was reluctant to move at that time. After his death two years later, the family was free to leave Italy – Tony, his parents Andrea and Caterina Rufo, and the remaining siblings - although the sponsorship offer was no longer open.

Antonio Rufo, ready to board ship bound for Australia, 1962
Photograph from the Rufo family collection

The large family, now reunited, established itself in Hamilton, in a house in Elcho Street. Tony had been learning the hairdressing trade after school in San Donato, and found work at Frank Morrin’s barbers shop in Hunter Street, Newcastle. He picked up English – there were classes for migrants, but he found the Western movies showing in the Regent Theatre (also known as Herbert’s) in Islington much more entertaining.

Frank Morrin eventually retired, and with his help, Tony was able to buy the business. In his mid-twenties, Tony married Clare O’Neill, a country girl with Irish heritage from Bellbrook, near Kempsey. Clare writes in her memoir:

‘The choice I made was to take my chances in the city. In 1965 I headed to Newcastle with stars in my eyes and ten quid in my pocket! I had landed a job with Rundles Manufacturing and Tailoring, and was over the moon….I was on my way.’ [1]

At Rundles she worked with one of Tony’s brothers. It was a short step then to Tony. Describing how her siblings settled closer to home, Clare continues:

As for me, well I said that I marched to a different drum…In 1969 I married Antonio Rufo, an immigrant from that old and worldly country, Italy. I was enraptured by the family oriented culture of his people. Their fierce loyalty to the little backwater that was their ancestral home matched my own. There was a common bond, an affinity I hadn’t experienced before.’ [2]

Tony and Clare settled in Hamilton, and are still there today.

Clare O’Neill, aged 16 grew up on the banks of the Macleay River, NSW
Travel to Italy and the discovery of the importance of the history strengthened her spiritual connection with the landscape of her Australian childhood home
Photograph from the Rufo family collection

 Clare is passionate about her husband’s homeland, loves their sojourns there, and wants to continue as long as they can.

I wondered if Tony’s parents would have preferred him to marry an Italian girl?

‘They don’t care about such things,’ he says.

‘The family is a league of nations,’ laughs Clare. ‘We have Dutch, Ukrainian, Polish, Portugese, Slovenian, an Australian, three Italians – and one brother is a priest!’

The Rufo family traces its lineage back as far as 700 AD
Tony and his brother Basilio Rufo beside a Latin inscription in San Donato confirming this, 2014
Photograph from the Rufo family collection

Tony’s grandparents made a hard scrabble living on the mountainous terrain outside San Donato, growing what they could for their own needs, and to barter. Olives, grapes for wine, tomatoes and other vegetables, and fruits such as figs were grown, but these days, the family land is no longer productive. The floor of the Val di Comino is a rich agricultural valley, with lush pastures. Its olive oil is reputed to be some of the purest in Italy, and used in the Vatican.

The home of Tony Rufo’s maternal grandparents, San Donato
Photograph from the Rufo family collection

Tony’s first trip home was 20 years after he’d left, in the early 1980s.

‘To see the place I’d left so long ago, thinking I’d never see it again – it tore my heart out,’ he says. ‘Now when I go, I think – I’m home again. It’s all so familiar. People I went to school with – looking just the same, only older!’

Clare learned to speak the regional dialect from Tony’s mother, and to cook the Italian way, by watching her. Tony’s and Clare’s sons, Antoni and Jamie, were raised in an English-speaking household, but have shown themselves able to quickly pick up Italian on return trips.

In August, San Donato is in a holiday mood.

‘Parties every night; we eat outside and relatives and friends join us; all the women cook; a cousin plays the piano accordion; there’s something happening all over the village,’ says Clare. ‘It’s very relaxed and laid back.’

Even with the summer influx of people, San Donato is a safe place to be. ‘There’s no crime – everyone’s family – they all look out for each other,’ Clare explains.

Local police prefer to keep a low profile during this time, for just this reason - everyone is a friend or a relative. Police from neighbouring towns come in to ensure law and order prevails.  And despite the party atmosphere, there are no drunks, and no brawls. That’s the difference.

Driving, as in Italy generally, can be a hazardous occupation. Finding a parking space in narrow medieval streets not built with modern cars in mind, is a constant challenge. Tony and Clare remember seeing a car parked illegally in San Donato, under notice by a parking inspector. The owner couldn’t be found, so a group of his friends simply hoisted up the car and carried it to a safer spot. That’s Italy!

In 2014, Tony and Clare stayed longer than usual so they could experience the send-off of walkers on a 40 kilometre pilgrimage over the mountain that separates Trasacco from San Donato. The pilgrimage honours Trasacco’s patron saint San Cesidio. Mayors ceremonially exchange the flags of their towns, and the pilgrims are accompanied by friends and followers for 2 kilometres through Trasacco, under a police escort. Walkers pause to sample free cakes, fruit and snacks from roadside stalls.

Walkers ready to begin their pilgrimage over the mountain from Trasacco to San Donato
Photograph from the Rufo family collection

A special date in the San Donato calendar is 7 August, the birth day of the town’s patron saint, Saint Donato. Clare and Tony marvel at the way the town unites to commemorate and celebrate this day. Each year, religious rituals meld happily with the pageantry of colourful processions, noisy bands, and fireworks to create an event that people never seem to tire of.

Saint Donato is known as ‘The Protector.’ When an earthquake struck the town in 1986, everyone was down on the flat watching a big football match. No one was hurt, but the houses clinging to the steep mountainside were very badly damaged.

Communications had collapsed, and the authorities feared many had been killed. Coffins were transported into the town – only to find its population alive and well. The Protector had saved the people. Government funds poured into San Donato for rebuilding and renewal, giving the town a welcome facelift.

A larger than life size figure of Saint Donato is carried out of the church by bearers as part of the celebrations of his birth day on 7 August each year
Photograph from the Rufo family collection

Paintings by Clare capturing the streetscapes of San Donato and the landscapes of Bellbrook hang on the walls of the Rufo home. It’s how she stays connected with the places she loves.

These days, Tony works in the Hunter Street shop where he now owns both the business and the building. He is thought to be the longest business owner/operator  in the Newcastle central business district. While Antoni joined his father in hairdressing at the age of 16, Jamie has pursued varied careers and is passionate about his outdoor activities in the Australian bush.

Windows reflect the buildings opposite in Tony Rufo’s immaculate shop
This Hunter Street, Newcastle site has been a barber’s shop since 1946

I wonder how Tony thinks of himself now, having rediscovered his homeland and formed new and powerful bonds with it.

‘Australianised Italian,’ Tony laughs.

Then Clare sums it up.

‘During the World Cup,’ she says, ‘when Australia was playing Italy, Tony couldn’t decide which side to back. So he had one bet each way!’

Tony and Care Rufo, 2012
Photograph from the Rufo family collection


Thank you to Tony and Clare Rufo for sharing their story, and to Brian and Anita Agland for the introduction.

[1]  Clare Rufo 2002, Up Bellbrook Way. A memoir. Clare Rufo, Newcastle p. 41
[2]  Clare Rufo 2002, Up Bellbrook Way. A memoir. Clare Rufo, Newcastle p. 42

Saturday, 14 March 2015

Knowing the Gow family of Fettercairn, Hamilton

There was no celebratory clinking of glasses of Scotch whisky when Fanny Gow, aged 42, gave birth to a boy in 1886, after 10 girls in succession. Temperance was the watchword of this prominent Hamilton family. Ramsay Gow, Fanny’s husband, was a foundation member of the Sons of Temperance, a member-only organization devoted to a life of abstinence from alcohol. Fanny herself was a great worker for the temperance cause, though her father was a publican.

It has always intrigued me that Ramsay Gow is celebrated for his contribution to Hamilton, but it is his wife’s story that really fascinates.

Ramsay married Frances (‘Fanny’) Birkby in 1860. Her father Thomas Birkby was by then the owner of the White Horse Inn at Maitland, but he had had a varied career, including as an overseer of convicts, and a police constable.

Ramsay and Fanny’s much awaited first son was named Walter Ramsay Stuart. Two years later, another boy William Allen Hodge, was born.

Walter’s daughter Vera Carter (nee Gow), spoke at a large Gow family reunion in 1996.[1] Her speech filled in many of the details that were missing when I wrote the original blog post on Fettercairn.

‘I imagine there was often an enormous sigh of relief that (my grandmother’s ) biological clock had run down,’ said Vera. She continued:

‘After all the years of ceaseless childbearing, one would expect Fanny to retire gracefully and put her feet up.’

Of their 13 children, nine had survived. Fanny still had a large family to take care of, but in time, this energetic woman wanted something more. Not just for herself and her family, but for the women of Hamilton who sewed and knitted clothes for large families. She knew exactly what was needed.

In the mid 1890s, around a decade after bearing her 13th child, Fanny Gow embarked on a new career. As Vera explained:

‘Newcastle was expanding towards Hamilton and beyond, and Gow and Co., Drapers and Milliners, Montrose House, Beaumont Street, Hamilton came into being, due to her enterprise, energy and initiative – supported of course by Ramsay. ‘

An asset to Beaumont Street, the department store prospered, rivalling Scott’s and Winn’s in Newcastle.

Gow’s Drapery (Montrose House), corner of Beaumont and Cleary Street, Hamilton, 15 August 1898
A discount chemist now occupies this site
Photograph by Ralph Snowball, part of the Norm Barney Photographic Collection, courtesy of Cultural Collections, University of Newcastle, Australia

In 1903, building began on the Gow’s new home, to be called Fettercairn after Ramsay’s Scottish origins. Of a grand scale even today, the Victorian style mansion would have been seriously impressive then. At last, after 14 years’ hard work consolidating the business, the Gow family would have a substantial home that stood as a testament to their success.

Ramsay Gow experienced great losses in his childhood, learning early to be independent. He was born to John and Jean Gow, a year after his parents arrived in Australia from Fettercairn, Scotland. Together John and Jean had eight children, but their father John died when he was just 44. Ramsay was 4 years old. His mother Jean died when he was 10, and he went to live, not altogether happily, with his older brother David and wife Margaretta. After leaving school, Ramsay first worked for David, but soon left to join the Department of Navigation.

Ramsay never visited David and Margaretta again, remaining in the Department of Navigation for 28 years.

When Ramsay Gow retired from the Department of Navigation in 1901, he would have only six years of productive life ahead of him. Apparently a quiet and dignified man, he was a JP, a member of the Agricultural Society, the Hamilton Bowling Club and of course, the Sons of Temperance. Ramsay devoted himself to acquiring and managing real estate, and died in 1907 of a cerebral thrombosis. He was 67.

The Gow family residence, Fettercairn, at Lindsay Street, Hamilton, 22 April 1904
Photograph courtesy Newcastle Region Library

How sad it was that Ramsay and Fanny had so little time together to enjoy what they had worked so hard to create.

Fanny gifted a set of gates at the entrance of Gregson Park to the Hamilton Municipal Council, to honour her husband.

Vera Carter tells how her father Walter began working in the store at the age of 14. He took over from Fanny around 1906, a year before Ramsay’s death.

When I interviewed the four remaining ‘Gow girls ‘ – former employees who as as young women had worked behind the counters at Gow’s in the early 1940s and 1950s - they told me that Walter Gow was by then the owner. Their interactions were mainly with the manager, Ray Hitchcock, but they recall Mr Gow coming in at 10 am every morning to do his rounds of the counters. More fascinating details about the inner workings of the store are  here.

The store closed sometime in the 1960s. The world of retail was changing, as were customer shopping patterns and expectations. It appears Gow’s may not have kept pace with the times

Of Fanny, Vera writes:

Fanny wasn’t a cuddly grandma, she seems to have been respected rather than loved. Her grandchildren were in awe of her, and she would not allow them to use the front staircase, insisting they use the back stairs. She was religious, strong minded and energetic, and it is obvious she ruled her family and the staff of Gow and Co. with a very firm hand..’

Fanny Gow died at Fettercairn in 1923, having lived in the grand house for 16 years as a widow.

What then for Fettercairn?

The history of Fettercairn is told in the blog post ‘Survival of a stately home’ including its time as a private hospital and a boarding house for students from the country.

The future of the historic house came to public notice after the 1989 earthquake, when the then owner, Newcastle surgeon Dr James Holley, applied to Newcastle City Council for permission to demolish it. He had bought the property in 1978, and devoted almost a decade to its restoration.

After heated community debate, permission was refused, because of its local environmental heritage. Three or more years in limbo followed, until in 1994, Fettercairn found a new owner – Newcastle printmaker and photographer Philip Gordon. After 18 months of meticulous restoration work, Philip was able to open the Lindsay Street Gallery. Upwards of 75 exhibitions would be staged there.

Notes of ideas for exhibitions to be held at the Lindsay Street Gallery, Hamilton
Philip Gordon, mid 1990s

Meanwhile, the Gow descendants had scattered far and wide, but the threat to their ancestral home had spurred some of them to arrange a family reunion. Through  a collection of letters left by Philip Gordon to the current owners of Fettercairn, we get a sense of what the preservation of this house meant to the family.

Frances East, granddaughter of Ramsay and Fanny, and daughter of Ethel Alice (4th daughter) met Philip and Theresa Gordon in mid 1996, following the reunion. The restoration of Fettercairn was complete and first art exhibition had just been opened in the Lindsay Street Gallery. With other relatives, Frances had been invited to see the house.

On return to her home in Christchurch, Frances wrote a letter of thanks to the Gordons:

‘There’s no need to say that the Gow reunion was a great success in every way – and our visit to my Grandparents’ home was a nostalgic experience. As I told you, I stayed at Fettercairn many times until my Grandmother died – something no other person at the reunion had done. It was a great experience to have you both show us around and we were very impressed with the love with which you had so painstakingly restored the grand old home and retained all the ‘bits and pieces’ that you found during the restoration period. We were very touched with the retention of the torn up and slightly charred letter written by my much loved Aunt Katie (Harris).[2]

Restoration of Fettercairn in progress
Photograph by Philip Gordon

Vera Carter, another granddaughter of Ramsay and Frances, daughter of Walter Ramsay Stuart Gow, wrote to Theresa and Phil on 27 August, 1996 thanking them for inviting them to the opening of the Lindsay Street Gallery:

It was a great occasion and you have a wonderful collection of paintings. As I told you, we were almost reconciled to the thought that Fettercairn would disappear and to have it restored so beautifully is almost a miracle. I’m sure Grandfather Ramsay and Grandma Frances Gow would be delighted.’ [3]

In a later note, Frances East echoed Vera’s sentiment, speaking for all the Gow descendants:

‘…we are all delighted that people like you both, who have so lovingly restored our old family home with great care and interest, are the new owners.’[4]

Restoring the archways required the bricks to be cut individually to form a curve
Photograph by Philip Gordon

In 2000, Fettercairn changed hands again, returning to its past use as a family residence. In September 2014, photographer Craig Smith and I took a group of Lost Newcastle followers on a walk to explore Hamilton’s historic past. Always mindful of the privacy of people who reside in historical places, we were unexpectedly invited in by its present owners. Everyone was in awe of the way they have taken custodianship of this beautiful house, which continues to be a grand Victorian residence.

In the Fettercairn entrance hall is a glass case with memorabilia of the Gow family
This photograph is of a Gow family portrait. Members have been identified
by descendant Frances East
Standing at rear:
Ethel Alice Victoria 3rd daughter 1875-1959 (mother of Frances East)
Edith Annie 2nd daughter 1869-1943
Lucy Theresa 4th daughter 1872-1966
Adults seated:
Lydia Frances 1st daughter 1867-1951
Ramsay Stuart Gow 1840-1907
Frances Theresa (Fanny) 1844-1923
Seated next to Lydia (left) is Beatrice, 6th daughter 1881-1969
Seated next to Frances is:
Jessie Milne 5th daughter 1880-1966
On floor left to right:
Walter Ramsay Stuart 1st son 1886-1962 (father of Vera Carter)
William Allan Hodge 2nd son 1888-1969
Catherine Ross Gow 7th daughter 1884-1962

Photograph by Craig Smith, taken of a photograph in Fettercairn 2014, courtesy of the current owners


Thank you to the current owners, who shared documents and photographs passed to them by Philip Gordon. Philip Gordon generously assisted Hidden Hamilton with information for the original post.

Related posts

[1] Speech ‘The Gow Family Succession’ by Vera Carter given at the Gow Family Reunion, 1996. Further quotes from this speech are in italics, not referenced.
[2] Letter from Frances East to Philip and Theresa Gordon, 29 September, 1996. 
[3] Letter from Vera Carter to Theresa and Philip Gordon, 27 August 1996. 
[4] Letter from Frances East to Philip Gordon, 17 October 1996.